How to Nurture your Soul: Religion and Spirituality

Religion and spirituality are often seen as two things that are related but don’t go well together. In truth, they are more like two sides of the same coin, they represent two aspects of something and make a whole coin. Until recently modern times, one’s religion and one’s spirituality were considered the same thing. Many people believed that religion is what you did in church and spirituality was the way you followed those lessons from church at home and in your daily life. Sometime in the late 1800’s and Early 1900’s, spirituality and religion began to separate. By the Mid-20th century, they were divorced and living their own lives.

What caused that separation and then divorce? The easy answer is the way people looked at religion and spirituality. The more in-depth answer is that as society changed and grew, people’s outlooks on what was religious in nature and what was spiritual in nature changed and split into two complexly separate entities that may or may not be compatible anymore.

Religion is organized, communal belief and ritualized worship of a higher being or god. Spirituality is defined as the practices concerned with the state and growth of the human soul or spirit. The definitions have changed since the days when the Church defined the spirituality of the people. Today there is more opportunity for a person to decide what they do and do not believe in and whether they wish to be religious, spiritual, or even both to a degree.

Religions have many benefits for individuals who follow and adhere to their rules. First, religions are communities. They provide an individual with like-minded people and a sense of connection to others. We all like the feeling that we belong somewhere and be it a church or a coven, religions give us that sense of feeling. Second, religions are organized and there is a set of rules and dogma. Once you learn what is expected of you, it is easy to follow the steps, and everything is explained. There is a sense of consistency and clarity within a religion. Somewhere is the lessons and study programs, your questions will be answered. Third, religions tend to be very future focused. Many religions are focused on how your behavior in the past and present effects and determines how your future looks. Follow the rules and the future will be good. And lastly, religion can be morally clear on what is acceptable and not acceptable within that belief system. For someone who doubts their moral compass, religion guides them in the right direction.

Religions can be great for many people. There are very religious people out there who are doing great things to make the lives of their fellow religion members lives better and more enlightened. There are many people that find great comfort in their religions. There are, however, downsides to every religion. Religions can develop an us-against-them mentality that is not every healthy for the religion’s members but also for the community surrounding the religion. Shunning and violence against perceived outsiders have been historically noted. Quite a few religions utilize fear as a way of controlling their members and members will sometimes use fear to recruit new members. For individuals with mental disorders, this can be very detrimental to their mental health. The doctrine of religion will often leave many members with questions that go unanswered due to the dogmatic nature of the doctrine. The doctrine will sometimes cause members to be cast out from the community when they need the religious communities’ help the most. Religions are also known to make individuals feel guilty when they fail the ideals of the doctrine, but often forgo the concept of personal responsibility in favor of blaming outside forces for those failures. Lastly, not all religious leaders have the welfare of their members in mind and can and will cover misdeeds and abuses perpetrated on innocent members of the congregation. Handling a situation within the religion without police intervention when laws are broken and innocents are abused, is never the sign of a religion focused on bringing community and comfort to its adherents.

There has always been good and bad within religions and no one religion is perfect. Everyone has done something that violates their doctrine at least once in the past. Some have tried to rectify those errors and others ignore them in the hopes that history will forget them, or they acquire enough power to rewrite the history relating to those abuses. I know a lot of people who find great comfort in their religious beliefs, and it has made them better people and has helped many lives.

Spirituality is the more personal side of religion. A spiritual person communes with the Universe by themselves. They do not need a building full of people chanting in unison to feel the Higher Powers of the Universe. Spirituality is informal and personal. There are no pre-written scripts for worship, it is you, your Higher Power (should you choose one), and your soul. It is a personal relationship with no rules, other than what you feel is appropriate. Morality is determined by the individual and many highly spiritual people tend to adhere to a high moral code not because of the threat of punishment, but because it feels like the right thing to do. Spirituality focuses on the soul and inner workings of the person and many spiritual people work hard on healing their trauma and bettering their mental health. Since there is no dogma or rules in spirituality, the person can change their spiritual focus as their needs and interests direct them. Spirituality is also very focused on the present moment. A spiritual person tries to heal the wounds of the past with the focus being on making this moment the best now they can. There is a popular saying among spiritual individuals that “the only thing of importance is the now. You can’t change the past and the future is not guaranteed. “

Spirituality is not without its downsides just like religions . Some of the biggest downsides relate to this being a personal belief system. Some people get lonely when only focusing on themselves, they feel disconnected from people. Finding a group of like-minded people that encourage spiritual growth and exploration without trying to direct or confine your growth can be difficult in some areas, but finding a group like that is a good way to reconnect. For many, the informal nature leaves a seeker feeling overwhelmed by all the choices and the lack of direction. Journaling about what you want can help a person find direction when needed. Personal change and growth are scary. It can feel like you are drowning in the dark at times, maybe find a friend or a therapist that you can talk to when you need someone to listen to where you are at. Don’t get so caught up in being spiritual that you lose touch with the reality around you. Grounded spirituality is always best. The biggest downside to spirituality is the teachers and gurus that offer instruction only to defraud an individual or worse. Be careful, keep your friends close and communicate with them, and if it doesn’t feel right with your soul, don’t do it. Sadly, not all spiritual people are really enlightened, and they should be avoided.

With all this being said, can a person be both religious and spiritual at the same time. I believe they can be. Done well, they compliment and enhance each other. However, there are some religions that demonize spirituality. Be aware of what your religion says about personal spiritual work. I belong both to a coven and do a lot of spiritual work on my own. My coven is my community, and they are very much in line with being a spiritual person and doing spiritual personal work. I believe in balance and feel that a balance between religion and spirituality can be very beneficial.

At the same time, I do believe that you can be either spiritual or religious without the other one. That may just be where you are in your soul journey and that is fine. . We each need to do what brings us deep joy, connects us to the Universe, and makes us a better person in the end.

We are only given one chance at this incarnation, and we need to do what we feel is best for our higher self. If religion feeds your Divine Spark, then follow one, or if spirituality brings it joy, then be spiritual. If a combination of both works for you, go for it, it is your soul and your rules. Find your joy, feed your Divine Spark, and make the world a better place.